In June, a wonderful mom,
Hannah (Riley’s mom), from the WHS community emailed me to let me know her
family would be in Chicago in August. Hannah was hoping we could meet and get
the kids together. Yikes! The prospect of meeting another family in the
community was exciting and scary rolled into one -- especially back in June. JD was still in the hospital and we were still new to this whole world. Would I
be prepared to actually become part of the WHS community? At that time I was more of
an outsider looking in which was working out perfectly for me. I could peak in
the open window to listen to the conversations without having to join the community.
Who was I to join in the
conversation anyway? We were only a few months in with JD who was still a small
baby. JD was trying to figure himself out as we were adjusting to our new
normal of going to the hospital everyday. Here we were being pampered by some
of the best nurses and doctors in one of the top 10 children’s hospitals in the
country and I was suppose to jump in to a community of people who have been
living it everyday for months, years – and even some – decades.
Yes, I wanted to meet
Hannah’s family but I needed JD there with me for support. And at that point in
June JD had recently gone back to the hospital so the timeline for his departure
was unclear. Therefore, the prospect of opening the door and stepping into the
community alone was close to becoming a reality.
However, this was not the
first time someone had reached out. From the moment we posted JD’s story on
WolfHirschhorn.org we have had remarkable parents reach out to us with
open arms. It started with Kevin (Kendall’s dad) who is the administrator of
the wolfhirschhorn.org site. I had reached out to him back in February shortly
after we find out about JD. It turns out he not only runs the site but he –
along with his family – live in the Chicagoland area. What are the chances?!
Within the first few months
he invited us to a WHS get together with some families who were in
town. Immediately, we were welcomed into the community without hesitation. While
Nate and I not ready to meet the families it opened the shades
slightly to this brilliant community.
Next came Hilary (Magnolia’s
mom) who started to read our blog leaving inspiring comments with each post. We
had already been following Magnolia as we found her blog during our initial
research. Nate and I race to be the first to read each update. By this time Hilary
seemed like an old friend. When having conversations about JD I would refer to
Magnolia and Kendall as though we just completed a playdate. Their milestones
became my talking points.
Finally, came Autumn
(Tyler’s mom) who was the first to "Friend" us on Facebook.
(Side note: how do I say
Friend? Do I say “Friend” or Friend or
“Friend”? What is grammatically correct when discussing Facebook “Friending”?)
Being Friended on Facebook
is a big step because it allows you to be invited into someone’s life. No
longer were we only seeing the carefully written blog posts but instead we were
now allowed a glimpse into the whole life of a person. It became more than
doctors’ updates and developmental milestones. Now we were privileged to see something
truly special . . . . the everyday. And Nate and I cherished it.
Autumn also invited us to
join a private Facebook group with other WHS moms and dads. A place where
questions are asked, stories are shared, and hearts grow bigger. Everyone in
the group understands the joys and challenges faced everyday. The fear of the
unknown and the excitement of the unpredictable.
Within 20 minutes of sharing
our story within the group I had 15 new Friend requests. Some from England and
Ireland – whoa. With each new Friend request, with each new story and with each
new picture I slowly took steps towards opening the door to the community. I
watched from behind my window as strangers became friends and as other families
looked for strength in someone across the country – or even across the pond.
Then came the National
Convention in July. Of all the places in the country it could be held it was
taking place in Indianapolis – just 3.5 hours outside of Chicago. Nate and I
had debated about going but as the weekend approached my desire to attend
became greater. I had no interest in the doctors or experts that were speaking
because we have a wealth of knowledge at our finger tips at Lurie’s. No, they
did not interest me but the reason I wanted to go is I finally felt ready to
join the community. I was willing to take that full step into the community
that unknowingly had helped us through the last 7 months. I wanted to hug and
thank each of the parents whose blogs we had been following or the parents posting WHS.org
updates or asking the same questions we had within the Facebook page.
However, JD was still in the
hospital and while 3.5 hours is reasonable it was not close enough for us to
leave our little man for the day. Alas, I continued to watch from the window as
the community grew stronger and friendships grew tighter.
Here I go again, long winded.
How does that mom you talked about in the beginning of the post fit into this ridiculously
long story? Well, Hannah is the mom who finally took my hand and escorted me through
the community door on August 17th.
Leading up to her family’s
arrival Hannah reached out to a few Chicagoland families to meet up while they
were in town. I casually asked why they had chosen to be in Chicago this
weekend. “We will be in town for the Air & Water Show. My husband is a Blue
Angel.” WHAT?!?! Seriously. Of the hundreds of people who apply each year only
3 are chosen and I now know one of them. Amazing!!! I feel like in this jaded
society not many jobs impress people but a Blue Angel is something even the
hippest of hipsters finds super cool and impressive. I don’t know what it is
but jets flying at supersonic speeds 18 inches from the next plane through the
city gives me butterflies every year. And I now I know one of them . . . already
JD is giving us opportunities we would not normally have in our lives.
It was all set. On a
cloudless Friday morning at the Lincoln Park Zoo we officially became members
of the Wolf-Hirschhorn community. Hannah with her kids, Kevin with his kids,
and me with my boys all gathered for JD’s introduction to the community. There
were no nerves just an eagerness to see JD’s future.
The morning was great with
the loud zooms of the Air & Water Show practice at North Avenue Beach. The
animals were enjoying the cool high 70 degree weather. While the kids . . . were just being kids. It is hard
to describe what I saw that morning but I felt like JD’s future was laid right
in front of me.
Riley is a 3½ year old shy
little girl with big beautiful blue eyes that sparkle in the sun. She walks
around carefully while looking at the animals clapping her hands which becomes
contagious. As I watch her, I too want to clap my hands at the wonder that is
nature. Riley is thoughtful as she sits in her stroller with one figure lightly
placed on her lips while she takes in her surrounds. I imagined a thought
bubble above her head that says “hmmmm” similar to what Connor says when he is
debating something. Riley does not speak but her actions tell her story.
Then there is Kendall, the
chatty 5½ year old who loves babies. She was immediately drawn to JD, the
“baby.” Active does not tell Kendall’s full story. She is a girl who springs to
life when you ask her a question. Similar to other little girls she wants to
help by pushing the stroller and checking on the baby. Kendall walked with me
for 20 minutes pushing the stroller only stopping to check on JD. Connor was so
impressed he followed Kendall around as she went from the stroller to the
animals and back again. Kendall runs and laughs and has a smile that lights up
even the dark reptile house.
The boys and I were only
able to spend a few hours with the crew as JD had another appointment but those
few hours were all I needed to envision our future.
Our future includes . . .
Big stunning blue eyes that
laugh with the continuous smiles he gives throughout the day.
Our future includes . . .
Chasing after two boys who
toggle between being active and thoughtful at a moment’s notice.
Our future includes . . .
A little helper who has a
concern for others and wants nothing more than to show off his skills.
Our future includes . . .
A smart, loving, active, but
most of all happy little boy who will bring joy to everyone he encounters.
If this is our future . . . it seems we have been blessed with the perfect life.
If this is our future . . . it seems we have been blessed with the perfect life.